So, the big news: I have left North Carolina. Like, left left. The very trees and air were touching me…all the time…it was making me antsy and anxious and aggravated. I quit my job, took my last paycheck, packed up my car and came back down South way for the Christmas Holiday. See, for about two years now, my grandmother has been bugging the shit out of me to come back down and be a help to her. I’ve been denying it for a long time, because I really knew better. However, I kind of talked myself into thinking that since it’s been such a long time, maybe things would actually be ok…. Ya know, “sometimes you gotta go backwards to go forwards” type shit….  Long story short, I’ve been asked “don’t you want to go back to NC now” … Like, no, but it’s cool. 

So, “where I am” … mentally feeling kind of alone. Physically, with some notfamily that’s more like family than blood family. Spiritually, I don’t even know anymore where I am… kinda stuck in this place where I don’t know… Is there something bigger in control of this picture… Or is that wishful thinking…. I don’t know. 

And that’s where I am:  The only thing I know anymore is that I just don’t know anything at all.