A divorce in progress and I’m bored out of my mind. This isn’t exactly what I had in mind when we parted ways, but I literally spent the first few months alone (not that a single Mom is ever alone much) but with my own time, and thoughts. I painted walls because I hated the colors “we” selected. I cleaned under kitchen cabinets; I pulled out the fridge, almost broke my toe…and then I dusted everything. And when it was all done, I found myself still bored, eventually with a glass of wine and often roaming the internet. 

 

So much porn. Some things I wish my search engine never would have touched because the Google ads will forever keep suggesting I order a small prosthetic male figure that I didn’t want to actually fuck but just wanted to see how “real” it actually looked. LOL. Damn it, I can’t un-see the mouth and the weird eyes. I found images, gifs, and vids of all sorts of tantalizing sexual fantasies but glued to the ones that turned me on the most: girls with other girls – the genuine ones…very hard to find; men with patient long deep strokes – I literally turned my iPad sideways one day trying to see more; and when I was feeling extra feisty, multiple men with one very lucky (or unlucky) girl. I salivated at creative point of views, voyeur perspectives, public anything turned me on, and fascinated with the mixture of sex and power. 

 

It wasn’t long before I had a “like” list of my favorite things. Things that I knew would make my body yearn.  Then a mini-panic moment when an account “suggested” the head of the PTA to “follow”. Fuck…Block. Block! Rookie mistake. 

 

When I was alone, my hands would roam. 

I forgot how sexual I was…I am… how good I felt, how I tasted and mostly how amazing it felt to just enjoy myself, uninterrupted, not rushed. I was fixated with one woman for a while, she was older than me and was enjoying a “boy toy”. Her face online looked mature but sexy as fuck, knowledgeable, experienced, unashamed. Her body was firm and being explored and enjoyed by the younger boyfriend while another recorded quietly enough to know one was there making wet sounds and fumbling with the camera but unnoticed otherwise. The sounds she made when the boy toy entered her would send my body into instant tingles and had me grinding in my chair, searching for relief. Rewind. Watch it again...and again. I loved it and before I knew it I was obsessing with my own re-found pleasures to the point where I thought I had an issue. Ha.

 

A few months passed and while it’s fun to enjoy the self, adult human interaction is necessary. I’m coerced to head out with some girls and over a bottle of wine we shared intimate details of their failing husband’s sexuality and how hours of “love making” have become begrudged choirs of heavily sweating hairy bodies that lingered for too long over them. I giggle…it’s why I’m single now and they know it. We chat about the changed dating scene and how online is simply a quantity over quality game.  I’ve stopped listening when they said they no longer give head...but why? It's so amazing when done right...I can't listen and I’m literally thinking of how much time before I can go home and feel my newly purchased Amazon vibrator on my clit. The thought of the forced vibrations tugging a cum out of me and how many times I’ve secreted gushes of moisture or floods of pent up orgasms, make me blush and cross my legs tighter. I can feel my panties holding the wet spot against my lips. Shifting no longer is going to help. I get up to go to the bathroom and one of the friends joins me and shares: You don’t have to rely on just dating sites she says. There are forums where one can explore, be intimate, and actually have connections…I’m surprised this innocent Betty even knows what explore means but I’m intrigued.  

 

So I research. I watch other models, I even see her and I'm pleasantly surprised with her. I fall in love with a few; their character, their smile. I make a profile and with sweaty palms, turn on my cam and there is instantly flattery, teasing exploration, and curiosity. I have some fears but mostly intrigue and then I have my first private and I’m watching myself and wondering what this other individual looks like. How his words might match his expressions. He tells me how hot I am and it fuels me to show him more because it is hot to see, to not worry about anything besides my pleasure or care if I’ve creamed too much.  I can be as nasty as I want. I can talk as dirty as I like. I can call him a bitch if I want to. LOL. Mostly, I can be myself with no reservations and I can cum as many times as I want. Once undressed, I used my fingers and make a V over my clit and begin to rub, thinking about what this watcher might be doing. I start to think about how much he wants to shove his rock hard cock inside my body. I ask him if he likes what he sees and he can barley type three letters.  The pressure grows and I dip my long fingers inside my cunt and then pull them out to my mouth and suck on them, then shove them back inside of me again. The pressure on my walls feels wet, aching, soothing to touch…fuck…it feels so good. I forget he’s watching. I wonder if he’s alone. It feels naughty yet good; I glance back up to look at myself, to really see myself for the first time in a very long time…naked, legs open, nipples hard, mouth moaning, pussy pink and exposed…I grin at myself and he instantly asks what I’m smiling at and then I drop my head back and release my first ever online cum.



Property of OhFuckJade