I know you've enjoyed letting yourself go over the holidays, and eating everything your heart desires. How about instead of hitting the gym and sentencing yourself to boring unsatisfying meals in January, you agree to gain with me? It'll be amazing. I clearly get turned on thinking about you expanding in size, growing a big sexy belly for me to grab and other jiggly bits for me to enjoy. I talk about how we'd get you fatter, how easy it will be, and how much I hope to have you gain throughout the year. This is going to be the best New Year's Resolution yet!